;Just stop and ponder.

Moving.

2010-01-22T02:26:00.000-08:00

I have decided to move my blog.

Blogger is so retarded. x.x

I'm using Onsugar. for my new blog.

Relink.

http://unravel-the-riddle.onsugar.com/

:p

Ice Cream! :D

2010-01-20T00:37:00.001-08:00

I can has Strawberry Ice Cream Phone!

Finally. A decent phone. Imagine bringing a brand less China Phone in poly! -.- So embarrassing. Now can post pictures! People say, this phone is a curse. The sound system cracks, the phone lag etc. Lols. As long Cheap and Chio. * grins*

& yes, i'm very outdated. People now, buy Lg Lollipop, i buy Lg Ice cream. -.-

Photo quality doesn't suck ok! (btw, thts Mr. Butler )

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I think i should set something straight.

I'm not married.
I'm not attached.
I'm single.
I'm unavailable.
I'm half- engaged.

Status? It's complicated. * thumbs-up *

" See love in a different way. "

D:

2010-01-18T02:24:00.000-08:00

Came across a really good quote from Jovena's blog.

"If you're fatherless/motherless,pple make fun of you,laugh at you

If you're raised by one of your parents,ppl call you a bastard,

they call your momma a prossie

When you look different from others,ppl call you weirdo,alien,ugly,Freak

When you slouch,ppl call you a camel,no backbone

When you're too tall,ppl call you a giant

When you're short,ppl call you a dwaf

If you're fat,ppl laugh & call you names-fatty,obese kid,Ah pui

If you're skinny,ppl call you paperthin,they call you a pole,a bamboo pole

If you're not good in your studies,ppl say you're stupid,dumb.

If you're poor,ppl bully and throw money at you and call you a beggar

When you're rich,ppl call you a show off

When you dont speak up,ppl call you mute,Eh gao is it?

When you repeat what ppl say,they call you a parrot,a copycat,no originality"

So what does this mean? Nobody is perfect. Angeline Jolie? Nope, she's not perfect. Who knows maybe she have an abnormal pussy. See! No one is. Except God.

" I hate sandcastles. "

Hallelujah.

2010-01-11T10:47:00.000-08:00

After month's of busting my ass by sitting on my pink chair everyday, 12 hours, it finally paid off. It's a 15 baby, suck it in. The most jaw dropping news. B3 for Maths. Who would have thought a cuckoo brain like mine was even capable of that? Never felt so smart in my life. Pftt. But, i started from scratch alright. 3 months, of doing Maths Papers everyday. I deserved it. * Pat's own back. *

And comb. science? An 'A2'. Studied for one half months only.
A whole 2 years of straining? B3 for Biology. Terbalik dong.

The most embarrassing thing, C5 for English. Cheese bun. And people say i could write novels. -.- Must be because of the jippies. It's alright you don't need to know what's jippies. POA? F9. I slept during the papers. Duh. :p
Humanities? B3. Besttt. :D

Hu-Ha, followed me to school today to take my results. I just want to thank him for being the only man, that has been with me, when times are hard during O's. I'm glad he could share my joy on that day too. Vise versa, i shall go throught up's and down's with him too. Darl, we have our lives mapped out in front of us. I hope out love can make it come true. :D ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've promised God Almighty that if i ever get 16 and below, i'll be His faithful servant and worshiper. Imagine if broke the promise, He'll probably say this, " Oh Nadira, behold the wrath that awaits you. I have granted you your oh so desired wishes and alas, you betray the pact you had made with me. Suffer the karma that you deserve! "

Lols. Enough drama. I planned to memorize new prayers.
(P.S : I actually don't know the right way to pray. Shhh. Hu-Ha! Teach me! )

Today, i was on the way home. An Indian man and a malay woman sat beside me in the train. I heard the Indian man whispering to the malay woman, " Ehk, lawa seh yang sebelah. " And both of them stared at me head to toe. I was cursing in my heart, " fml." The woman said this. " Ehk lawanyer. Are you malay? " I showed her a ----> -.- face. "Yes." I would be more pleased if a hot matrep were to say that then a banglah and a random malay woman. In what way am i not look like a malay? Must be my Edward Cullen look alike skin.
Shuttup. Let me have my kembang moment please. Thank you.

dammit.

2010-01-10T00:07:00.000-08:00

It was so surreal. The dream. It was almost ethereal. Your smirk. The girl you left with. i couldn't really see her face. It was all fuzzed up. All i knew, she had long, straight black hair. The constant ring from my cell, broke the visions of sadness before. " Unknown number" it said. And so i thought, you called. The unsophisticated voice of yours. It was the soothing melody that ushered me to sleep everynight a year ago. At that moment, i felt safe. The feeling of comfort. Who would have wondered you'll call after? Where have you been?

Was i ever anything to you? Who are you to wonder in and out of my life without any notice? What am i? What do you want? You left. Four months ago. Leaving me, speechless. Alone. And totally ignored. It's all about you isn't it? You leave whenever you like? You return bringing euphoria with you, and left with ignorance. Have you tortured me enough? Crying everyday for one year? Three hundred and sixty five days. Wasn't that enough punishment for me leaving you? Dammit. Just when i finally found someone who's worth better. Where the heck were you?

Leave me forever. Yes, you were right. Everyone has a bad past. Unfortunately, yours is the one i could not disregard.

Waaaah.

2010-01-04T03:03:00.000-08:00

This is the best Manga ever! Cried like hell.
D:

( P.S : This manga is explicit. )

fml.

2010-01-03T11:13:00.000-08:00

I was attached on 1st Jan, and here i am single again, on the 4th.

Nintendo DSi <3

2009-12-28T08:15:00.001-08:00

Nintendo DSi! (:

Introducing my soon-to-be-baby!
I won't stop hogging my mum for this.
Really.

Can take Neo-Prints everyday cause' there's front and back camera!

I can haz Nintendo DSi puhlease! (:

<3

2009-12-24T09:00:00.001-08:00

I love my Mr. Romeo :D

Lol. The world is ending.

2009-12-20T08:24:00.000-08:00

Don't be shocked.
I really hope she will learn her lesson one day.

KL?

2009-12-13T05:09:00.000-08:00

KL.

Let's just say my trip was a very enriching and divine one. Next week off to Batam.

Mum & Dad. Happily married for 7 years. ( p.s:mum told me dad didn't lay a hand on her for 8 years.As if. Liar! )

Remember the marriage between Siti Nurhaliza and Dato K ( probably "K" stands for kental ) ? It's very common in KL. Everywhere i go in the hotel, i'll see old filthy rich man, with gorgeous young wives. I was having dinner in the hotel. Then there was this girl, that stands out among the rest. Me and my dad, just can't stop staring. So beautiful... with thick make up! & we thought that's Siti Nurhaliza. Beside her? A hideous old man with sagging eyebags and a teenage girl my age. So cheap the girl. If you ask me, i wouldn't mind going for rich young guys instead of poor young guys. Ask any girl, they will say the same. But old rich guys? No! Siao ah? I think he's dick also never work anymore la. -.- Feel like telling the girl this , " Hey, do you want to enjoy the rest of your life w/o pleasure? Even if he use "V" power, it will look gross with Sagging balls! What's more, you won't sleep in peace, cause it's as good as you're sleeping with your grandfather. Get a life." it's not that i'm jealous or anything. It's sick aite.

Another cliche image of the Malaysian icon. ( minutes before my dad got pickpocket-ed ) -.- fml.

My dad lost $600 and RM200 when we were taking the Monorail. Dad's IC was gone, so as driving license. Pickpocket-ed! Indeed, KL is such a dangerous place. And you know how they can succeed? By attacking in a group. When we wanted to leave the monorail, the group purposely squeeze us, so we don't realize it. I still remember when i wanted to go out, a woman was standing in front of me smiling.. like those perverted smile. I thought she was being friendly. In the end, she was the pickpocket-ter. Fuck you, i hope you get AIDS or Breast Cancer! My dad cursed the woman, that she won't be able to shit or pee. Wth! My dad is so lame. When my dad reported it, the police told him that he was the 3rd person on that day being pickpocket-ed at the Bukit Nanas station. wht the fish! & it's all my fault, if only i didnt beg my dad to take the monorail because it's jam. -.-

Masjid India. :{D

The fresh lilies, in the hotel.

:D

The rest of the story? My mum closed the window without saving. what the hell. -.-

"Screw Bella"

The only personage that i've looked up upon all this while. Everything that i own, is compared to you.

the english prodigy.

2009-12-10T07:32:00.001-08:00

Today, i spoke to a guy who has superb ability of communicating. I've never felt so inept in conversing in English before. I feel so inferior with he's darn skills. This made me realize, that there are people who are like way better. So form now on, i shall read more bestselling author, like Amanda Quick and Nora Roberts books. & he's Malay. Pfft, like where do you find a Malay guy, who looks like Edward Cullen the Malay version who speaks like as if he came out from the past century? He does look like Edward... with that piercing stare... either that or he just psycho-ed me into believing that he's a vampire. You know, words have very strong effects on the mind. So do i have to look like Bella, if i want to score this one?

Never been so degraded by a guy before. Like, what? I've got to think and rephrase my sentence before chatting with him. Omg, i'm such a loser. No! I shall not be looked down upon by a guy.But he's interesting. Very. Should i go out with this English Prodigy? Can't deny that i've gotten myself attracted to this intelligent species. But like Hafizah always say , " Then yang lagi satu tu, nak buang maner? " So, you should only date one per time. Hu-ha's the one. So be more witty in making decisions.

Currently, in the city of muddy soil. Kuala Lumpur. Dont ask. Translation by my mum. Will upload pictures on next post!

"why is it so hard to fall in love? It's not fair to Hu-Ha. "

Life.

2009-12-02T11:56:00.000-08:00

I wanna look at life on a new perspective. I try to hide the fact that i'm a fragile individual. So try to give up this facade. Sometimes the events in our lives are not meant to be. So from there, you learnt to let go and move on. Eventhough your heart yearns for those that were gone, it's just best to leave it behind your mind as a part of your reminiscence.

The end.

2009-11-14T05:28:00.000-08:00

13/11

It's done. It's done. Months of agony, just gone like that. I still can't believe i got this done and over with. Oh God, grant me an A for Biology and Sciences. I stayed up till three in the morning burning the midnight oil. I want a 16. I want a 16. To celebrate the end of it, my clan and i decided to go Seoul garden. Whooping 176 dollars. Tsk. But it's Ok. It's all you can eat. (: Being a carnivorous for the night. Finally post pictures. Not the prettiest sight of me. Learn my lesson to never meet a guy after eating Seoul Garden, cause you'll smell like a roasted pork.

(:

Siti at the side.

The holy. The wacky. The smarty.

With Zenobia. Still think i will look prettier with makeup.

Then went prom dress shopping. Took the whole day to find. Use to be 79.90 then discount till 49.90 and it's the last piece! Woo. Must look like hotcakes on Monday's Prom. Don't fall for me. Ok, whatever. Tried shopping in Ion. Omg, too Expensive. One hideous shoe for 189, whereas in Far East, can even find a 3 dollars shoe. Widening gap btween the rich and poor, obviously i'm in the poorer side. Still need to buy/lend shoe and a nice necklace and hairband. 100 dollars gone in a day.

Too frumpy. Told you i gained weight. & no this is not the dress.

& Hu-Ha, send me home after that. Still can take pictures though. I don't look for looks anymore. If you're nice, you'll catch my eyes. He's the nicest person ever, and i thought guys like this didn't exists anymore. I like guys, that are able to compose themselves with confidence even though they lack the looks factor. We are so similar, physically and mentally. He has droopy eyes, so do I. He's goofy, so am I. And etc. He's a pretty good catch. But i change my mind easily.

Coming Soon... As if, I'm not easy to fall for.

my heart has bled in the past. So many things left unsaid. But with you, it's all surpassed. The only love i want is pure and true, not a love full of lust and lies.

God.

2009-11-02T09:06:00.000-08:00

Should i just puncture a hole in my bank account for a hand phone?
This is my dream phone.
Why?
Because it's fat.
Because it's sleek.
Because it's sexy.
Because it's a camera phone.
Because it has a stylo name; Satio.
Because it looks like my face; Flat in the front, thin on the sides.
Well said right?

Got the urge to post about something, suddenly lost my inspirational touch. Ah yes, to sum it all, i'll just phrase it.

" Just realized that beauty and brains are nothing compared to a person with a heart of gold."

It's been a while I've been in touch with God Almighty. Sometimes i wonder whether he has the heart to forgive me. I know he's a forgiver. He's probably distant away from me. I just want to change for the better. Be a better person. They say, if you get closer to God, you open up, and you shine within. Urgh, done so many sins. & i better stop saying ; fuck. Filthy word. No short skirt. Guess YC and Fana, would be wearing bikini. Nadira, do not wear. No. No. No Sakae Sushi. No Mos Burger. The end is near anyway. Don't want to die, being unpure. Maybe find someone who can change me for the better. Teach me values. Tell me the purpose of living everyday, is for the sake of god. Still wondering, whether God still loves me.. I'm so seeking for spiritual guidance after O's.

O level? Forget it. I've screwed my English Paper. I'm not suprised if i failed or get C6. Can't believe i wrote out of point. Lol. Maths, it's ho-hum. Sciences, Think i did preety well. I hope get B3 or A2! Duh, slept at 3.30. Humanities, maybe can get B4. Haha, Poa : F9.

:D

To Dearest :

2009-10-29T10:23:00.000-07:00

I know you never meant to hurt me.But i always knew you were never serious about me. I have feelings you know. Either I'm a nutcase or I'm just blinded by love. I don't know how, i can love someone that hurt me so much, without even a slightest change of feeling. Yes, I'm unromantic, bossy, not Ms Perfect you always wanted me to be. Sorry, i can never pour out my feelings towards you, guess the only way i can express myself is through writing. My biggest fear is losing you. You know that. I dread the day it arrives. It turns out, that day is today. But no. It's okay, I'll face my fear. The first day i saw you, you look like an angel that drop off the sky. Bright. Jubilant. Sparkly. New. Pure. I never knew someone so Perfect existed. I know it'll take a while for me to forget you. A love this strong, probably another year and a half or two. More than that, and I'll swear I'll go to the psychiatrist that I've always wanted to go. How come everybody's first love is so perfect. How come not mine? Maybe i chose the wrong guy. Maybe i suck as a girlfriend. Maybe i'm just too stuck up. I still had your picture though. I kept it under my pillow. it's the first thing i look in the morning, and the last at night. The sight of you, is the only thing that keeps me going everyday, even if you're away. I guess I'll just throw away that habit. I know la, you model, SP ambassador, got big house here there everywhere, soon to be pilot. Who the heck am i anyway? Just some god damn simple girl next door who loves watching discovery channel and read national geographic magazines, with no fashion sense. Only got pretty face but body of an African child suffering from osteoporosis and malnutrition, on the verge of death. Fine i get it. you deserve a hot ass Italian super model. If our heart is ever detachable from our body, mine probably look as if it got chewed on by a dog and ran through by a truck. 18 stitches won't improve the sight of it either. Why would i be anything of a value of someone so up there? Fuck my life. All i wanted is someone who can take care of me. Show me the value of life. Motivate me in times of hardship. Be faithful. And just, love me. I love you a lot. Just take care of yourself. I know it's impossible to find someone like you again. I'll always pray for you. I hope you find someone you can really treasure, and you take care of her. She must be one lucky girl.

I think, I'll just try my luck with hu-ha. Who knows, he might be the kind of guy for me. Even though he is not that good looking. He seems to be the only one that seriously cares for me right now. Motivates me, and change me for the better. Hopefully, he can make me forget him, and bring me back all the happiness that i use to have last year. It's been a while since i've been sincerely happy. Never knew a person with a heart of gold before. So far, i've only seen guys with black ones. Naaaadiraa. Must stop crying! Don't know what to do to move onnnn.

When you walk away
I count how many steps you take
As you leave my life forever.

When you turn away from me
I lose sight of the face I
Once thought was in my life forever.

When you don't speak to me
My heart breaks since
I miss the way your voice sounded
When I assumed you were mine forever.

When you leave my heart
The pieces of my broken heart
Are missing you so.

When you're gone forever
You leave heartbreak in your wake.

I never thought it'd hurt that much
When you left.

Days seem likes years without you.

I need you when I cry
Even though I never thought you will ever come.

You're out of my life forever.

You've left me with severe heartbreak.

And the sore truth is.....
I still love you.

; Being a Nerdsaurus.

2009-10-24T11:33:00.000-07:00

;Being a Nerdsaurus. 16 more days to total eternal freedom. Brain capacity low. The only mode to release stress: talking on the phone with Hoo-Haa. (P.s: If you know what i mean.)

Perfection.

2009-10-10T11:28:00.000-07:00

The purpose of me having this blog is just to upload my thoughts. If i don't, i can't sleep. Yes like now. There are two types of people in this world, the introverts and the extroverts. Obviously, I'm an introvert. If there's two words to describe me, that'll be : Silent and Anti Social. So what's bothering me tonight, till i can't get some shut eye?

Perfection.

I have to admit. I'm just a bad ass perfectionist. There is nothing in my room that is wrong. Everything is perfect. Every nook and cranny is clean. Book organized according to size. Not a single speck of eraser dust on my table. The only place i could ever study is a place that is absolutely silent, extremely clean and clear and fresh air. Anything other than that, is a no-no. Anything moved or placed in my room without my knowledge gets tongue lashed by me. I get very very upset if i fail any subject or test. Simply, I'll put it this way. Do i sound like a crazy psycho perfectionist to you? I can't even stand a single pen mark on my bag. -.-

I've gone to wiki and search about my condition. I'm a neurotic perfectionist. People who are unable to accept satisfaction because in their own eyes they never seem to do things well enough to warrant that feeling of satisfaction. Yes. I am never satisfied of anything. Never. This includes partners. The truth is, no guy can't stay in good terms with me for at least one month. Well, expect for one. (Either I'm a nut case or he is... )

Whenever i go on a date, a crinkle on a guys shirt makes me cringe. He's ability to talk to me matters. If he's some guy with thick Malay accent who is not fluent in English turns me off. & now, i found a perfect guy with a body of a sex god, a brain of a genius, communicated in nerd, disgustingly loaded, mastered the way to keep me speechless and ?I'm still not satisfied. The truth is, women never know what they want. What more teenage girls, where they get stuck in between childhood and maturity. Confused whether to follow their developed instincts and hesitate because of their lack of experience.

& what's wrong with me? I'm jealous of the Perfect man I love, that he is better than me in every aspect. And here i am, desperately trying to be the perfect girl that is up to his standards. A perfect girl, can cook well, does great gardening, caring, beautiful, intelligent, sociable, responsible .... now, my aspiration is to be one. Don't say i didn't try. I planted daisy seeds on a pot, and died two weeks later. I tried cooking pau, and it turned black as soot. I'm not beautiful, I'm just pleasant. I tried to be sociable and people thought I'm on ecstasy. I try to be caring, but it's too fake. It shows through my face. I try to be romantic, the only thing i can think of is... well hmm errrms i don't know. & the true reason i never wear dress is I'm thin as a surfboard and damn i hate to say this, I'm not Pamela Anderson. You don't get it. Fine. Breast. Even though I'll have a breast implants and botox, I'll still never be perfect. I just want a guy who loves me for who i am, even though I'm like Keira Knightly with that skeletal frame of hers and that A cup bust size. Period.

Darn. I wish i wasn't Virgo. Perfection never existed, it's just my psychological way of thinking that i instill myself with ever since i was young. I wish i have the sense of satisfaction in me.

Nadira, just face it. Nothing is perfect. ( Except God that is. )

Either youre lying about your feelings , love. Or it's as good as it gets.

Addiction. <3

2009-09-17T09:09:00.000-07:00

Zee Avi! I've always love-d this genre. Is it Indie? Is it Jazz? I'm not sure. It gives me the calming effect, and it turns my frown around. Those little things that instill happiness.

"I'll just sing with the birds. they'll tell me the secrets of the world."

One more singer. Yuna! She is a walking contradiction. Who on Earth wears a scarf, & has a voice like that? It's weird, but who cares, she's awesome. I want a voice like this! ^^

"I'm a sad and pathetic, at the same time. Unlike you.."

16.

2009-09-11T10:53:00.000-07:00

Sometimes i wonder, what birthdays are for? Is it a celebration with your family and friends, of how grateful to have you born on that day or it is just a tradition? Well i know i don't celebrate it. Birthdays are just like any other day. Well this year is different, because more people remember. I still remember, two years ago, only 1 person remembers my birthday. & that was a lesbian in school. Guess she probably had a reminder on her phone. I'm a giver, not a receiver. I give people presents whole heartedly, not expecting any in return for my birthday. I'm quite generous if you can say. I just find people that announce their birthday to people very annoying. Every year, on 10th September, it's always been a ho-hum affair. Unlike my sister of cause, with an extravagant " Doa selamat " specially for her. The best birthday i probably would have had was last year with... hais, i don't want to even think of it. God, grant me amnesia or dementia for my birthday.

At least my parents remembered this year. No wait, my daddy don't give no shiznit my birthday, only my mum and sister. They bought me a mousse cake. A small doggy bear on a pail & a door hanger as a birthday present. Well, I'm very appreciative of that. And i thank them for their effort. It made my day, besides that, i get to makeover my room - new drapes, many flowers, a big ass painting & new coat of paint. ( Actually thought of adding a fountain in my room, but, i'll save that for next year.) Ate at Seoul Garden, got $100 from auntie. & i wonder why i didnt receive a hongbao from my father...

I was supposedly to go out with Izaki. There were several other who asked me out to celebrate but, God knows why i chose Izaki. & Hallelujah, i got ditched again. Well thank you Izaki, for ditching me on my birthday at the very last minute as your present. And he doesn't even have a very reasonable excuse too. Money was never an issue alright. I'll never forgive him because he made me sulk alone, at home on my birthday, thinking i could have gone out the others who asked me out. Izaki, if you ever read this, I've got something to say, ditching people because you got no mood in the last minute, is extremely obnoxious behavior alright. :P

So what did i wish for? Of cause, when you're crying everyday of the year, until now, i guess the most obvious thing i would have wished is happiness i guess. They say happiness is your own responsibility. Guess is my own fault for dwelling in my past. If i don't get over by end of this year then, I'm seriously considering to go to a psychiatrist. Don't be surprised if you ever found out i got admitted to IMH, okay, I'm thinking too far again. -.- I said, i wanted to pass O's. Passing is not good enough okay. Why the hell did i wish for that? Should have said, I wish I'll get below 16 for my O's.

I'm webcam-ing with Hazwan right now. He's showing me the shirt he just bought from Zara. ( P.S: Look like Bangladeshi. ) I've got one thing to say. I'm dating my best friend, yes, the one with the banglah face below. Yes, i won't be surprised if i end up with this retard. Honestly. Not that i didn't know he has a thing for me, this is called, give a chance. I ask him why, he say because I'm nice. Of cause, i am nice. In every aspect. Except for my sarcasm. What i like about him? It's because i can be myself. Let's see where this may lead in the future. i know i look awful in the picture, hello, reality check. Look at the time.

Webcam with Hazwan.

{Yes, I've got the dreamer's disease }

2009-09-05T15:16:00.000-07:00

How would you feel if someone keep on insisting they love you, but you don't believe it at first cause it's too good to be true, but you still do, cause it sounds to sincere. In the end, it's all fake and lies? & then you lose all your self-confidence because he said that you're not pretty & got degraded by being called a pussy. ( maybe you got called that, cause you've got one and he doesn't) And he said that he doesn't even think about you, and he doesn't give a bull to who you fall in love with & go out with? Then you feel like a dog, because the way he communicates have not one bit of respect. Then not realizing that you don't want to meet he's friends it's not because of your reasons but his cause you want to save he's face from someone that is nothing but a bagful of embarrassment like yourself & Lastly, you sit down on the sofa crying like as if someone just died, thinking why are you so in love with someone that is as such who treats you like dirt, then you can't stop looking at the window grill thinking whether you should consider jumping off your bedroom window, just to have a chance of getting amnesia, so you can sleep peacefully never knowing your past or maybe if you ever died while jumping off, maybe your soul can scare the living daylight out of him. And now you're typing this cause you feel like some toy you gotten free from a box of honey star cereal and then you have evil thoughts of buying some kind of African Voodoo doll, so you can torture the shit outta him or that he does stupid things in front of other girls.(E.g, unzip he's pants in front of a group of girls) & then you feel like a fucking spastic typing this , cause you can't stop laughing about what you just typed.... at 7am. :D I'm just full of bullshit sometimes. Haha. :D

( Maybe i should buy this. You should see what they wrote on it.)

I feel awesome now. Thank you blog for making me feel like a total retard, laughing by myself at 7am in my room. -.-

It's Farhan. <3

2009-09-02T07:52:00.000-07:00

Farhan Shah is the most drop-dead gorgeous guy i have ever seen in my entire life. I sweared, the first time i set my eyes on him, it's like rain falling on a cracked soil, that withstand years of drought. Okay, no link. My literature is atrocious. The first time he appeared on TV. I screamed to my sister. "Who is he!? " & my sister said that,he schools in RP but he's arrogant & picks who becomes he's friend.Ego eh? It's okay, I love he's big ego. ( Reminds me of Beyonce's song. ) This is called love at first sight. The perfect Body. Perfect eyes. Perfect Voice. Perfect hair. Perfect style. The most perfect figure ever seen. There's one term to describe a person as such & that's called, "Perfection". He is my Singapore Idol. Doesn't he look like Prince Charming?

^^ <3

(baby are you going down, down, down, down? Even when the sky is falling down...}

Justice not met.

2009-08-27T07:18:00.000-07:00

Following up the recent reports, on an Muslim women from Malaysia that was sentenced by the Islamic Court for public caning, has got me engrossed with the thought that whether there's still justice in this world. Isn't it too harsh as a punishment for a woman, to face a lifetime of humiliation and shame just for drinking? I do honestly think,that the judge's verdict is too crude. I know, i do realize that Malaysia is an Islamic Country. But isn't her sins between her & God. She'll get her punishment in the after life. Don't they realize that such harsh punishments can have a long-term effects on her? Her future is gone. You think people want to accept her in society anymore? Besides that, she'll gained recognition for 'the woman who got spanked in public for drinking'. Her Job is a goner. Would you like a convict to be your secretary? Your Boss? Your employer? No?

that What's with raiding nightclubs to catch these kind of people? Look at Singapore. Am i not wrong to say that at least 1/4 of the Muslim Teenagers here in Singapore drinks? If such laws were implemented in Singapore, don't tell me they are going to carry out public canning to those people too? I find the Laws are to strict. So what, if it's a Muslim country? You don't expect everyone to be like cookie-cut , where everyone's perfect & follows the law. Despite the governments dire attempts to keep it's country as tranquil as possible, listen, it's a stringent act do set a law such as this.

"Muslims can be fined, jailed for up to three years or given six strokes of the cane for drinking alcohol, but prosecutions are extremely rare."

I've got three words. What-the-heck. & what's the next law? An old-age prosecution brought up such as: "Couples who had premarital sex are to be buried in the sand with only their heads showing & are to be thrown stones on their head till they die?"

;like finally.

2009-08-23T07:14:00.000-07:00

Blogger has been down for days. Firstly, i want to say, i did horribly for my Malay O level. Not that i failed or anything, I missed my target score by one grade. So, I'm retaking it. Now i have to waste my time & effort to study this useless language again. Peribahasa & what nots. Due to my desperate attempt to get an 'A', Fizah & Nadiah are going to force me to learn this dumbfuck language. We started by going to the library, I sweared, i almost vomited reading the first page of this book called, " Cinta Kita." So i read the first page.

" What's a Haryati?" I said. {honestly, i thought it's something like another word for sunlight.}

"That's a name!" both of them shouted.

I know, I'm such a loser. Always been. At least i became Bio Queen. Yay! New Year resolution, cleared. 19.5/20 . Not bad ah? *grin* Prelims next week. & VP told us, to get 25 points and below or, no September holiday! Need to return school, for extra classes. I know, i won't make the cut.

Prelim marks that i can foresee myself obtaining:
Maths: E8
English:C6 {Ms Aljunied is one hell of a lady.}
Biology:B4 { As much as i want an 'A', i know the school paper is merciless. }
Humanities:C6 { Venice is just damn gross. }
Mother Tongue:C5 {Oh boy.}

And what do you get, A 29. Oh wow, how facinating.

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{ you have to kiss alot of frogs, before you finally meet your prince}

;melancholy.

2009-08-16T09:35:00.000-07:00

Been living in a dismal life for almost a year. Maybe Mimi was right, I've got to stop dwelling in my past. If you asked me, the truth is, I've never been happy this year. Never. Guess my only Eden of Joviality is in school, where my friends are the only source of happiness that i ever receive. If only happiness were packed and suppressed into tiny capsules for sale to anyone feeling blue. Wouldn't world be a better place, where everyone unhappiness may cease to nothingness by just taking one of those capsules?

Maybe one shall ask, what is the cause of your misery? It's my ex. He practically sucked all those bliss from me. Well, i detest him so much. Why? Imagine, you love someone so deeply & you gave him your whole sincere heart to him, thinking he does the same for you, and in the end, you found out, wow, he's faking all this while. How hurting shall that feel for you? I really abhor this kind of soul, & i believe Karma has it's way in everything. And one day it'll get him. If i ever have a whiff of he's scent or glance of he's dishy face, i swear, I'll transform to full predator mode, & kick him in the nuts. Ahh! i feel so better now.

Today 17 August 2009, & i can declare that i have officially gotten over my dishy faced, Bechok nak mampos , Mr. Perfect Tak Menjadi, ex boyfriend, who have poor photo shopping skills for he's pictures. Nadira is ecstatic. I really so very pity he's girl.

{ Nadira found happiness thanks to words of wisdom by Mimi. }

UP! (:

2009-08-15T08:21:00.000-07:00

My hair is burned, and I've learn my lesson, never to venture to unidentified hair salons. I just straightened my fringe, because it's photo-taking on Tuesday. The tips of my hair feels like the ends of a broomstick,because of the professionalism of the hairdresser. But it's okay, thank god, for Dove Intense Damage Therapy Cream, my hair seems to be in better condition. ( What, i sound like an Advert. )

I watched Up! with Izaki yesterday. Miss him so much! It's been a while since we saw each other. I thought he left and flew with the wind. Just like the term, i don't know where i heard it, that goes like this. " If you were to return to me, that means we were meant to be." Be as friends again of cause. Just don't want to hurt another amiable soul again. I still remembered what my sister said, " Of all the guys, you introduced to me, I like Izaki the best. " He's such a fine, dandy and warm young man, trust me, I've never had so much fun with someone of opposite sex before. Why? Because i am truly myself with him, which i can't with most guys. He brought me places that not many would bring me, eg. Singapore Airport just to eat Popeyes. To the zoo. To build sandcastles in the sand. Who would travel all the way from Vivo to Boonlay just to send a slice of cake from starbucks to you? Pick you up from school almost everyday? Calls you 15 times a day? Fold paper hearts from receipts, even though it may not be the best looking heart? I doubt many would do that.- He may not be Mr Oh-So-Fantastic, but i am grateful to have someone as such in my life. Thank you Izaki for being a part of it! Life without you was never the same. Thanks for returning! :D

The movie well, it was great. It's about an old man awaiting for death, and while waiting, he got a brilliant idea to blow up thousands of balloons and connect it to his chimneys, so that it can fly all the way to South America to place his house beside a waterfall called Paradise Falls. & on the way, he found out that he was travelling with a boy scout that got stuck with him. blah blah blah... talking dog... blah blah .. evil artefact collecter... blah blah...a weird looking bird called Kevin. blah blah.. then live happily ever after, the end. Heh, not really a reliable summary of the movie eh, Jus watch it. It's a 4/5.

{ fly away with me into the sun! }

;demoralised.

2009-08-15T08:17:00.001-07:00

They say failure, is the key for motivation in learning. Everyone experience failure, at a point in their life. Today, I was tormented by failure. Honestly, I find failure very demoralizing. Why? You wreck your brains & your innards, till the wee hours of the night, burning the midnight oil & guess what? Wow!A 6 out of 18 for your recent Physics test.How encouraging. It's pulls down your self-esteem to do better. You should have seen my blood-drained face. I swear, my soul just escaped. I really felt like decapitating my Physics teacher. It's a fear. It's built in me, to reject any failure.I can't deal with failure. It drives me insane. That's why, for every test, i go through a sedulous routine of revision. Because i can't let failure get me. The moral of the story is, do not sleep in Physics class. (: I need to fight my fear.

I really should pass my maths quiz tomorrow or I'll be walking around the school with a deathly aura surrounding me.

:D
(P.S : Malay O's Result on 19th)

;& it's tatas to the other blog.

2009-08-10T01:07:00.000-07:00

& I'll give you 5 reasons why i ditched my old blog & didn't post anything for god knows how long.

1) When, i look at my old post, i feel like vomiting.
2) I realized, that using blogger, can edit my skin.
3) Hand phone spoil , can't upload pictures.
4) I want to forget my past.
5) Too busy with O's

;Why yellow room? I like yellow & my room is brightly painted in yellow. Simple. Yellow is the epitome of warmth, happiness, friendship, hope & optimism. The qualities i lack for as a soul. I'm more of a cold-hearted, sour, negative thinking, anti-social monster. So, hopefully this colour changes me to be a more, umm, sensible being. The colours you pick, tells a lot about people' you know.

O level Malay results are coming out on Wednesday. Wish me luck. I really hope i get at least a bloody B3. Obviously that won't happen, I've got a premonition of me, being devastated and slapped in the face with a B4 or C5. { you , see. I'm very negative. } I know it's too late to do anything right now.

{ & i'm blasting off to study Geog & Biology test.}